Well, today was a blast. Four interviews in Berlin. The first was with an Austrian TV channel. I stood in front of a camera with bright lights aimed at me, a red microphone held a few inches from my face, and answered a string of questions. Interestingly, my answers are going to be dubbed over with a German voice rather than subtitled. It’s what they do here. I asked for someone husky with a touch of Bavarian. The assistant made a note of this.

I also had to walk down a hallway and make a turn without looking at the camera. Not once. This is harder than it sounds. A naked woman would’ve been easier to ignore. I concentrated on forcing my arms to swing opposite my legs, as walking gets tricky when you’re on camera. I’m proud to report the job of walking was done with a single take. They said I’m a natural. I didn’t tell them how late I was at walking or being potty trained.

After that, it was three interviews back at the hotel. What a surreal experience. I meet someone in the lobby, we go to a quiet corner of the restaurant, talk for a half hour or an hour, meet the next person. Break for lunch. Meet yet another person. Shockingly, most of the questions didn’t overlap. Even better, I knew all the answers. This is the great thing about being interviewed: they are asking me shit that only I know. I’m pretty sure I got 90% of them right today.